Where my story begins

Leading With the Heart was inspired by my lifetime passion for the great power of love.

The story begins in my childhood. As a little girl, I overflowed with love for humanity, for the birds, for the trees. I was regularly brought to tears by the beauty I felt all around me. I wanted to spend my life helping, serving, giving. It was incredibly clear to me—love really was the answer to every question.

But from an early age, tragedies would come my way that would test this knowingness I held.

My father was an artist, a philosopher, a brilliant deep thinker. He was a professional musician who mastered a dozen or so instruments, but it was the piano where I remember him best. I danced many an imaginary ballet, moved by the magic his music brought into our home. It is still the piano I love best—where I am an inspired little girl, all over again.

I was five when he left us. And it was two years later when we would learn the truth of his departure. Like many artists and deep thinkers, my dad was a feeler. I can relate. Feeling is beautiful and wondrous, but sometimes the grief of feeling it all catches up with you—if you’re not careful, it can swallow you whole.

When I understood my dad had consciously chosen to end his own life, I was instantly overcome with the information I had at the time. Wasn’t suicide a sin?

As I tried to imagine my dad in the “flames of hell,” my body rejected it immediately.

NO WAY did I believe in a God, a higher power, or a Universe that would take pleasure in inflicting pain. NO.

I BELIEVED IN LOVE.

I KNEW that we lived in a good universe. I knew love was the highest force. And yes, that things could be really hard…but the hard things were not the truth of it all.

My dad felt he had no choice. And I understood this, despite my deep sadness about it.

I would still love him.

I would still love love.

I would continue leading with my heart, to keep choosing love despite the pain, despite the confusion. Because LOVE was the only thing I knew for certain.

My father and his three children (Charlie, me, Lauren - left to right)